I wish I was the mother who planned her children. The woman who knew the importance of timing the birth of a child into her life. Instead, I was the woman who thought it would be better to let God bless when he chose to bless me. Though I love my children, I know that if I had taken more control and consideration, then their lives would be magical.
I feel like I robbed my children.
With a planned pregnancy, I could have waited until I was married, financially stable, and physically available.
Don't get me wrong; I am fully aware of the fact that though life circumstances begin one way, they do not always stay that way.
However, a prepared state of mind can function in a more orderly manner while living haphazardly tends to keep me feeling like I am always playing catch up.
For example, I wrote my five year plan in 2012. It will be five years next year and most of the items are incomplete.
I must get on top of my life, and the first thing I have to do is gain control over my schedule.
I know my priorities must be God, husband, children, career, ministry. If I organize my to-do list and five year plan according to this priority schedule, then I should be able to accomplish much with less chaos.
I learned from the Virtuous Woman that intention and grace is key to the success of my plans. I will take time to focus on one thing at a time, and I try to complete one task in each area per day. However, I will allow God to direct my day which gives me permission to pardon my inability to conquer the entire list each day.
Also, I learned the Ideal Woman (Virtuous Woman) did not work alone. My family is my team. I will reach out to them for help.
Gaining Control of My Life:
Organizing My Task List
Categories - God, Husband, Children,
Decide If Family Can Help
Husband with children and home,
Children with chores, Parents with children,
Friends with children and ministry
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. (Proverbs 14:1 NIV)
The wise woman builds her house….
The way a woman cares for herself and her family teaches younger ladies how to build a home, and it shows the world the value of a good mother and wife. A good mother and wife is valued more than rubies and is considered a blessed individual:
A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies….Her children arise and call
her blessed; her husband also…
(Proverbs 31:10,26 NIV)
There is so much a woman can do to build her home. She can cook, clean, organize, decorate, tend to the children and husband, run errands, earn an income, teach the children, support the husband, and care for the parents.
It can be so easy to get caught up in the demands of the outside world or the internal dreams, yet it is very important for a woman to remember her worth in the home. The work within the home will build the next generation of government officials and church leaders.
The verse does not state that the man built the home; it states the woman builds her home. Mothers should dedicate the best of their efforts to the home.
Also, notice that the verses state the wise and noble woman “builds her house” and “is worth far more than rubies.” According to Dictionary.com the definition of wise is to
“[have] the power of discerning and judging properly as to what is true
or right; possessing discernment, judgment, or discretion.”
Knowing what is right and the power of discernment creates a woman who knows when to say no and when to say yes, a woman who can plan and prepare for the days to come, a woman who can recognize when her husband and/or children are struggling with a decision or event, and a woman who knows when to be present.
There is an urgent need for mothers and wives that can nurture, guide and provide the love that is needed to sustain a family unit.
A motivation to succeed outside the home is creating a household which is missing a wise woman.
Now, it is not often possible to be a stay at home mother; Sometimes the woman is the only adult in the household or the only working adult in the household or the wife’s income is needed for survival. That is understandable.
It is also understandable that God has a purpose for every female given to this world. However, He will never ask that you neglect building your house for His purpose.
A noble woman has virtue, goodness. She sets a tone of peace, happiness, kindness, and productivity within her household. A noble woman will set this tone on purpose.
The man and children conform to the atmosphere of the home which is created and changed by the heart, attitude, and actions of the mother. The house is the domain of a lady. It is where any feelings of anger, resentment, burden, pain, and disappointment will surface and linger.
The woman needs to be wise about the state of her heart and mind when in the home.
…but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. (Proverbs 14:1 NIV);
A household cannot thrive in turmoil. A family cannot reach for the stars when contention and bitterness surrounds them. A foolish woman will quarrel and the quarreling will destroy the home:
A quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping on a rainy day. (Proverbs 27:15 NIV)
No one wants to come home to an annoying endless drip.
Invite Jesus into your home. Dwell with Him there so that all foolishness may be put away and wisdom may overflow.
My name is Margaret McDowell, and I am with For EverLasting Revelation. A nonprofit organization that aims to journey with women through motherhood with God and purpose. I am not a Biblical scholar, but I am an experienced sinner who seeks God for love, guidance, and mercy.